Honesty is always the best policy

I have always found when I’ve got a problem that writing it all down helps clear my head. I can read it back and see things from a different perspective. It’s a cathartic process for me. So indulge me while I blog my way through this problem…

In high school I was told my opinion was worthless and I should fall in line and be a good little sheep. Rebelling was how I handled that expectation of me. I stand up for myself and I speak out if I feel strongly about something. This tends to piss folk off. It makes me laugh though as you hear/see so many people moaning but they never say anything or complain so nothing changes and the moaning continues.

I opt for being the change and a quiet email with a suggestion to a problem or asking for a further information is often well received over a rant.

I don’t like moaning as a general rule. If I have a problem I think it through, talk it through with Mark or a friend, find a solution and I tackle it head on. I tackle it quickly. Then I move on. No more moaning!

When my eldest started nursery it was big step into the unknown. First time Parents and we tried to go with the flow and be like all the other parents at the school gates but we quickly realised we couldn’t and weren’t.

So many folk seem to accept something because it’s been done that way forever, yet would moan constantly. Rejecting the unfamiliar seems to be a common problem and taking part in Parent Council sessions and meetings is often fruitless if there’s an old school approach and resistance to change.

I’m not saying for one second that I know better (I really don’t; I’m mostly winging it!) but sometimes issues or confusion occurred, which could have be easily avoided had a little more information been shared or by taking on or trying out a few different ideas that were suggested by other parents. It always made me wonder if any of us could ever really make a difference.

For years we sat back and accepted the ways things were at our children’s previous school. A couple of incidents meant we could no longer let things go and we started to speak up.

This caused various problems with staff and other parents who seemed to think we just wanted things done our way.

It was never about getting our own way it was about keeping our children safe after a knife was brought into the school, it was about getting answers to ignored questions , it was about getting simple first aid, it was about getting appropriate homework, it was about getting the correct level of teaching…

So many reasons led to our decision to move them.

That’s all behind us now.

We got so many messages of support when we left from other parents. Perhaps they were pleased to be rid of us, who knows, but mostly they seemed to admire our bravery for standing up and saying “no this isn’t acceptable”

A few said they wish they could consider other options but with transport and childcare it left them with little choice but to remain.

Delightfully more than few of them moved their children out of the school too shortly after we did.

A few are still moaning…

Where our kids are concerned we defend them fiercely – we are their voice and we will use it if problems or concerns arise.

On Thursday Loki had his final play session at a local private nursery. He won’t be going back next week. A simple injury was so badly handled by inexperienced staff it’s now severed the trust I had in them irrevocably.

They lied, then they tried to cover it up and then when I questioned it they suggested I’d caused the injury.

There is nothing that can change what happened now. Loki got checked over by a Dr and I was even more shocked to discover further injuries.

I totally understand that kids get into and upto all sorts of capers and mischief but honesty would have been all that was needed in this situation.

Isn’t that the best example we can set for our children?

I picked up the boys from school and they saw I was upset and they could see their little brother was visibly injured. When we went to the Drs with him to get him checked out we talked in the waiting room about honesty always being the best policy. I’m glad (and sad) I was able to turn what happened into a life lesson for them.

I am devastated with what happened though. The thought that I will never know what went on really stings. I’m so thankful that Loki is going to be ok. His injuries will heal and his scars will fade and all of this will be another lesson learned. We’ll be asking questions on injury policies to any future potential nursery so this won’t happen again.

I’ve debated with myself over and over whether to even post this but I think it’s important to share that speaking up for children is crucial sometimes. I want to be a role model for my kids, I want them to learn from our life experiences…

Even the bad ones.

I want them to know it’s ok to speak up when things are not ok.

I want them to be the change because I truly believe we can all make a difference.

Team Worrall

xx

8 Comments

  1. At the nursery I worked at, the staff often lied and covered up issues, even serious ones like kids biting each other, which I strongly disagreed with. Sadly, back then, I was the quiet one who just kept my head down, I wish I had done something back then. Given the chance, I probably would have, but they didn’t let me speak to the parents much, if at all – I think they knew I was an ‘honesty is the best policy’ type person. I’m glad you’ve got them moved to a new school, where hopefully they handle these things better. Wishing them all the luck x

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I think it’s best that you are ‘that’ parent, we need more of ‘that’ parent! Working at the group of nurseries I did, before having Logan, is the only experience I have with nurseries, which is one of the reasons I am so adamant I wont send Logan to nursery (among other reasons, of course. I do realise that not all nurseries are bad haha, but you know what I mean!) It’s a shame there are some crappy nurseries about xx

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  2. It’s not a nice lesson to learn, but at least you can take that away from the experience. Thank goodness he’s ok – how many other children have been injured and had it covered up?! Trust is hugely important between parents and others who look after their children.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Agreed. It’s definitely raised a few questions and other parents have been in touch to say they had concerns which just makes me feel even worse but at the same time glad he’s not going anymore! 💚

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